


And The Stars Look Very Different Today

by ThrowMeAStory



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: 3x13, Angst and Humor, BAMF Martha Jones, Doctor Who Feels, Epic Friendship, Family Feels, Fluff and Humor, Friendship/Love, Inspired by Music, Love Confessions, Martha Jones Deserves Better, Martha Jones Is a Star, POV Female Character, POV First Person, POV Martha Jones, References to David Bowie, Season/Series 03, Self-Discovery, Tenth Doctor Era, The Year That Never Was (Doctor Who)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 18:53:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28979181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThrowMeAStory/pseuds/ThrowMeAStory
Summary: Martha's thoughts as she's getting out.
Kudos: 2





	And The Stars Look Very Different Today

**Author's Note:**

> AN: This was thought up by me rewatching all of Doctor Who and reading all of the Martha's books during quarantine and falling deeper in love with her character. I will be mentioning Rose and even though I do not like her I won't be bashing her. I will also be making reference to The Story Of Martha by Dan Abnett, Robert Shearman and Simon Jowett.  
> Recommended Songs:  
> Satisfied- Renee Elise Goldsberry Stuff We Did- Andres Ramos(youtube) Space Oddity- David Bowie(for the last few paragraphs)
> 
> ENJOY!!!

"We know what we are, but not what we may be." - William Shakespeare

My stomach was growing heavier with every step I took towards the little blue box that had changed my perception on life in the small amount of time since I'd first set eyes on it in the alleyway across from my local pub. I knew as soon as I touched the wooden door I had to stick to my decision and not let him change my mind, which he had a tendency to do with very little effort. Finishing my phone call and snapping the device shut, I knew this was the right thing to do, not just for my family but for me and my future. Stopping just short of pushing it open, I stood and thought about every reason I had to stay and also every reason I had to go.

From the beginning The Doctor had me curious at the very minimum and acting like a useless girl at the very worst. The thrill I felt at saving him on the moon evaporating quickly as he kept reminding me that I was just someone he came across in the hospital, that I wasn't replacing HER. The amazement and nervousness I felt at meeting Shakespeare vanishing as he mentioned Rose and how she'd know what to do, making me feel the need to impress him instead of just enjoying what I thought was a once in a lifetime trip. The feel of stepping on to the ground of a different place that I'd never heard of a few minutes before tainted by the now obvious fact that he was using me to try and forget her, not realising that he was just ruining the experience for the both of us.

Being taken to planets and times which most people thought of as stories and then being dropped of at home made it all seem like a transaction, like it was something that he did all the time. Now looking back on it after everything I'd just been through I understood, if I could give something back to all the people who had helped me over the year that they now couldn't remember, I would do the same. Pausing, I was hit with a sudden feeling of recognition. I had, I'd given back their lives without even realising.

With a set decision at the forefront of my mind I pushed open the door. While he ran his mouth off about all the places he wanted to take me I just stared at him, I owed him big style but did I really have to pay him back by staying with him because he was still lonely? No, I could do it another way, by staying here and making a difference. By staying here and not abandoning my family when they needed me, by finding a way to be happy with the normality of my human life while helping make other people better.

By being a doctor.

I tried to explain it to him and what I got back the best thing he had ever said to me "Thank You". The look in his eyes was better than any confession of love I might have wanted in the beginning of our friendship, he looked Proud. The hug he gave me felt different now to how it felt before, it felt like acceptance. The way he treated me when we had been trapped by both The Weeping Angels and The Family, not forgotten but eased slightly.

As our goodbye carried on and I walked out the door I knew I had to go back in and tell him, not just chicken out. If I didn't get it off my chest now I might carry it for the rest of my life and after our time together I deserved to have to chance to heal properly, not just partially. He'd once told me about his home planet and after that our ships passing in the night relationship had become friendship. So I turned around and opened the door again, my entire nervous system lightening with every word that passed my lips.

Meeting Tom at the end of the year that never was made me realise that I might not be as in love with The Doctor as I thought. I mean I love him, more than I've loved anyone who isn't family but if I could start to catch feelings for another total stranger in a matter of hours, was I really as 'in love' with him as I thought? I figured pretty early on that he may never be over Rose completely but the constant comparison to a teenage girl I'd never met started to change the way I thought about him. Then with Joan It just solidified what I'd cottoned on to after New New York, it's nothing to do with me, he had a type and I just wasn't it.

Making my way back to the door I turned and smiled. This wasn't the end of our time together. It was just time for me to put what I'd learned to good use where it was needed and it wasn't needed with him. I knew as soon as I stepped out the door he would fly away and find someone else, but it didn't bother me as much as it once might have.

Life goes on and It was time for me to restart mine.

Smiling back at my mum through the window I opened the front door just as he flew away, my instincts automatically made me look in the direction where The Tardis had just been standing. There were children coming home from school with their parents, old people nattering away to each other on their doorsteps about what happened to The President. Tish was walking towards the house with the food shopping Dad had sent her out to get a couple of hours ago, trying to keep hold of the bags with one hand while the other held her mobile against her ear. The next few years for The Jones family would be hard to say the least, but we could get though it, together.

We knew the horrible and bloody truth but we also had each other, if i'd learned anything it was most people might not even have that. As I helped her carry the bags into the kitchen she told me about what she'd seen in the supermarket. Apparently a toddler had dropped his carton of apple juice on the floor and the mother hadn't seen it and pushed the pram away into the next isle. Then before anyone could clean it up a man had almost slipped on it and he'd gotten so flustered he'd started shouting at the carton on the floor.

I was still laughing when Tish went into the living room to tell Leo, leaving me to unpack the food. Noticing the cups on the side I thought i'd might as well do that while I was in here, so I lent over and turned the radio on. Lost in my own thoughts, I wondered if it was all worth it. The things I'd seen during the non existent year?

Maybe one day it will feel like it, hopefully. Shaking off the memories before they could take over I shut the cupboard door and moved on to the washing up. I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks as i turned up the radio, the lyrics making me grin from ear to ear as I recognised the song. Space Oddity by David Bowie.

The words to a song had never rung truer. As I swayed my hips to the beat and sang along, I looked out the window to see it was getting dark. The stars in the sky where just about visible but you could clearly see one shining brighter that the rest. The smile reappeared on my face as I heard his voice in my head.

"Martha Jones, you're a star."

"I spent a lot of time with you thinking I was second best but you know what? I am Good." - Martha Jones


End file.
